Thursday, September 8, 2011

Soulja Boy

The hoopla about Soulja Boy is yet another example of mass hysteria over an unpopular opinion. No matter how you look at it or how you try to characterize it, it isn't about a backlash of expression.  Instead, it's about making certain expression unsafe for those who would dare to defy convention.  The problem with a boycott is simple: you aren't merely trying to ensure that you don't have to listen to the viewpoint you don't agree with, you're trying to remove that viewpoint entirely from the public arena so that nobody, even people who don't have a problem it, can listen to it or access it. That's the end goal of all of this shit. 

This motivation was underlying all of the nonsense about the Dixie Chicks and Sinead O'Connor and every other artist who has ever dared to express an opinion that didn't align with what the mainstream thought. Well, fuck the mainstream.  Fuck the Catholic Church, fuck the Pope, fuck the Southern Baptist Convention, fuck every religion on the face of planet Earth, fuck the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines...hell, fuck the Coast Guard.  Fuck George W. Bush, fuck every president we've had for the past forty-one years because they all fucking sucked. And if you have a problem with this, fuck you too. 

Boycott my motherfucking page and my motherfucking notes. Show fucking people this note.  I give a shit. Oh, and here's my rendering of Mohamed while we're at it.  :>D ~(===== Issue a fucking fatwa, you Islamofascist bitch. 

I am really fucking sick and tired of groupthink, where every motherfucker always has to open his or her goddamned mouth and take offense on behalf of others. My father was a Marine, my grandfather fought in World War I, and I have one cousin who was in the Navy and another who still is.  I am not fucking offended by what some dancing minstrel fuck has to say about the military.  In fact, I kind of agree with the sentiment he expressed. Get the fuck over it.  

You know why I don't mind? Because my father and grandfather wouldn't have forced some Iraqi motherfucker to masturbate on video or to endure sexual humiliation as part of their orders to soften a prisoner up.  My father would have looked his bitchass commanding officer in the eye and told him to go fuck himself.   I can say without reservation that most of my relatives who have served would have done the same goddamned thing.  

Any soldier who goes along with that shit or tries to rationalize it by pointing to the potential consequences is a bitch.  The Nazis used the same rationale to justify their complicity with crimes against humanity. The difference was that the world didn't accept their rationale. We hung those fucking bitches.  Apparently, since a lot of soldiers don't have the spine to stand up for a soldier's honor and refuse to follow orders that are an insult to their uniform and the flag they represent, we need to give them a stiff spine at the end of a fucking rope.  And fuck you if you have a problem with my writing that.  I'm Jay Fucking Batman and that's how I roll.  
You are not merely expressing your sentiment that you disagree with that dumb fucking dancing bitch. Most of you are advocating driving him out of his entire career, banishing every song he's ever sang, ever video he's ever made, and every reference of him besides your take on his actions.  You want to deny others who might not disagree with his views the opportunity to choose for themselves, because if you have your way, his songs won't be on Youtube or the radio or anywhere else. Well, fuck you.  You can choose for yourself, but banning together collectively in a gang of boycotting bullies to intimidate radio stations, record companies, and media outlets is a bitch move.  

I'm Jay Batman, and this has been the uncompromising Rule Hard.  I hope I hit all the high points for all you bitch motherfuckers with soft guts and a tendency to get offended over bullshit.  The end. 

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

TSA Agent Thedala Magee Puts Her Gloved Hand into Amy Alkon's Labia

Ladies and gentlemen, the frontier of the fight against totalitarianism and the ridiculous level of fear that has proliferated over the past decade is your local airport, and the enemy is the TSA and its thug employees who have routinely sexually humiliated and harassed millions of Americans and their small children.  Amy Alkon, a blogger who goes by the handle of Advice Goddess, recounted her experience with the TSA and its employee Thedala Magee in her post entitled "Don't Give The TSA An Easy Time Of Violating Your Rights." The post recounted Magee's actions:

"...I sobbed even louder as the woman, FOUR TIMES, stuck the side of her gloved hand INTO my vagina, through my pants. Between my labia. She really got up there. Four times. Back right and left, and front right and left. In my vagina. Between my labia. I was shocked -- utterly unprepared for how she got the side of her hand up there. It was government-sanctioned sexual assault.

Upon leaving, still sobbing, I yelled to the woman, "YOU RAPED ME." And I took her name to see if I could file sexual assault charges on my return. This woman, and all of those who support this system deserve no less than this sort of unpleasant experience, and from all of us."

For blogging about this experience, Alkon is now facing a lawsuit for defamation. Magee, the woman who stuck the side of her gloved hand into Alkon's vagina in a public setting while Alkon sobbed, is threatening Alkon with a lawsuit for $500,000 and requesting that she remove her blog post on the incident.  Magee is an asshole, like most of her colleagues in the TSA, and she deserves nothing but our derision and contempt.

I am writing this to encourage every blogger to either repost this on their sites or to blog about this incident in solidarity with Ms. Alkon.  Let us put the name of Thedala Magee all over the Internet and immortalize her for all time.  I am taking a page from gay columnist Dan Savage's playbook and proposing that we make the name Thedala a verb.  From now on, to thedala someone shall mean to take one's hand and place into their genital area in an invasive and offensive manner.

Let us all ask ourselves if we know anyone who has been thedalaid lately.  And let us all raise our middle fingers in a salute to Thedala Magee and her attorney Vicki Roberts, a parasitic lawyer and bottom feeder who took on a client one step above a pedophile or an actual rapist.  While we are all capable of recognizing that what Magee did was not actual rape, the fact of the matter is that it would have felt like rape had it been your wife or daughter undergoing such demeaning and humiliating treatment at the hands of a TSA agent.

For those of us that travel, let us no longer stand silently and quietly while the TSA agent strips us of our dignity, but let us emulate Ms. Alkon and scream, yell, and communicate our humiliation and anger audibly while the process occurs.  To hell with the TSA, all of its employees and their cowardly adherence to the TSA's demeaning protocol.  Just because it's your job doesn't excuse you from failing to make a principled stand.  If the TSA told you to throw Jews into an oven, you probably wouldn't do it. Well...if you're Thedala Magee, you might, and you might sue anyone who had the temerity to blog about your actions after the fact for defamation when they called your actions genocide, because when the United States federal government makes an act part of its protocol, we all know that the act is automatically legitimated.

Join Ms. Alkon and take a stand.  Be a patriot with the way that you act, and reject any argument advanced by the TSA and Big Sister Janet Napolitano that attempts to legitimate what would be sexual assault if performed by any civilian.  Repost this, copy and paste it to your Facebooks, use thedala as a verb from here onwards to refer to such searches, and let us give Thedala Magee the fate she has earned with her contempt for the Fourth Amendment and the First Amendment of our Constitution.